Subs and Stuff One-Bite Reviews - Click a Sub to See the Rating

Thursday, August 20, 2015

Will Matt E. Bonez find Guy Fieri or Smash Mouth at Hey, Now, You're an All Star Sandwich Bar - Cambridge

They probably had the same dad, though. Big Guy, Sr. was smashing back in the late Sixties.
When Guy Ferry popped on the scene in the mid 2000s, he really filled the void of spiky-haired, Oakley-wearing, badasses that Smashmouth left gaping in my soul after the band's meteoric rise to and fall from stardom around the turn of the century. Until, that is, Smashmouth returned to the news this summer channeling Guy's freakiness as frontman Steve Harwell got out of bounds on the crowd for throwing bread on stage.

What's really creepy in all of this is that Smashmouth dude was 32 when All-Star went big.
The producers at Food Network gravely erred by sending far more mild Rahm Fama to profile All-Star Sandwich Bar in Cambridge. The episode of Diners, Drive-Ins, and Drives was already written by the Gods, yet they sent some bald bozo to profile the sandwich spot for "Meat & Potatoes." All-Star Sandwich Bar has some off the hook sandwiches that will take you on a one-way trip to Flavatown. Rahm Fama seemed pleased by their signature sandwich, The Atomic Meatloaf Meltdown, but he was far from exclaiming "shut the front door" even if the Inner Beauty Hot Sauce had him walking on the sun.

Sandwich Planets Floating in a Graffiti Galaxy Dude


All-Star's menu is filled with kooky twists on classic sandwiches, and the place is adorned with graffiti and sayings like, "A good sandwich is like an old friend." If this saying were true, I would be in jail for the rest of my life for the number of times I have brutalized and devoured my old friends. Yet platitudes aside, the multitude of sandwiches ring in at over $10 with cole-slaw and a pickle on the side. This is no bargain lunch, but the creations are creative and well-sized. Feeling freaky, Matt E. Bonez chose the Cubano on a menu devoid of Italian subs with the nearest substitute, an $11 Caprese sandwich.  Check out the One-Bite Review below.



The Cubano is jammed with delicious pulled pork, wrapped in oven-baked ham, and slices of swiss cheese. Mixed in with the mustard, a cilantro aioli, which you can see squirted out all over my juicy, little, bacon lips, fuses well with the mojo-marinated pork. Matching the spear served on the plate, the dill pickles were fresh, garlicky, and bright pointedly breaking the flavor of the other savory ingredients. The bread is a nice, light, crispy, and buttery french roll, which is a fair replica of pan cubano. 


The heaping amount of pork on this sandwich comes close to but falls short of justifying the $11 price tag. At the same time, it seems as though the mass of this sandwich prevented itself from heating to the proper temperature. The cheese was not melted, and it was slightly cool to the tongue. Regardless of price, the temperature of the sandwich cost it some points, where as the ingredients were fantastic. The creativity and originality reflected across their menu certainly enhances this cubano, yet the temperature and price keep this All Star on Team Rahm Fama instead of running with the big dogs on Team Guy.

1245 Cambridge St.
Cambridge, MA
8.0/10 on the Cubano Sandwich Scale

Hey now, are you an All Star? Do you feel freaky? Do you want to feel the touch of cotton on your pointy little nipples with Guy's face shining for the world to see? Get with guy. Be an All Star. Say no to Subway. Buy a shirt.

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